The Biggest Tale of All
It was late November of 2000 and SlayveX had just recently moved into an apartment with four other friends that all went to the same college as him. Namgorf had told SlayveX of this awesome game that he was just owning the hell out of everyone on, so obviously he had to take a look at it. Just watching that bastard play made SlayveX hooked, instantly. He ran across the street to Best Buy, and grabbed a copy of Rune, and immediately set out to rape some poor saps. After a full month had gone by, Namgorf had decided to turn off his FTP server a few nights out of the week, and host a Rune server that he and Slayve played on religiously. Nightly it would fill up, almost as soon as it was started.
Then slowly this one guy started coming through the waves of newbies and showing them that he had what it took to give them a run for their money. Goblin. Simple name, yet extraordinary skills in adaptation of situations, and quick maneuverability. As the nights went on, and the newbs would grow weary of the three of them raping them, they found themselves killing each other relentlessly for hours and hours, feverishly, all the while laughing their asses off at the pure comedy gold that spewed forth from their keyboards. Then one evening a group of newbs happened to be in there, and the three just ignored each other and slaughtered the poor newbies to pulp. One of the little noob guys bitched and moaned and said something about us being too good for his sorry ass.
Then one of the three, we don't recall who, said something about a clan. None of them were in one, and hadn't really given it much thought. But it sounded great to them. So they all just jumped on it. But a name, oh what the hell kind of original name can you give a clan that doesn't sound lame? So Namgorf leaned over to SlayveX and said The Hail Satan Network. It was brilliant. None of them were Satanic in any sense, but they did all share a bond in Deathmetal, which is why they communicated outside of Rune, to get MP3s from each other and plan Rune nights.
So they made their catch phrase Hail Satan. The people of Rune that ran into us went nuts. "WTF!??!?!?!?" they would all shout as the HSN would cut their heads from their bodies and promptly add the mandatory 'Hail Satan'. The responses achieved, recieved, and dished out were gold. This went on for months. Until one day Goblin said something about Bringing in this one dude. Yellowbeard. The man. Yellow was the icing on the cake of the comedy gold mine, he would pipe off that he sucked at Rune as he popped heads off, and made sides ache from laughing so hard. Then SorenBjerg joined up, another powerful addition that brought once again, something completely off the norm, something else that made the HSN seperate. Britney. Oh the amount of Britney. Then Shinobi, the once leader of many a strong clan joined up to have fun. And the fun continued for months and months and months. The lost archives of the HSN from the FSU forums were enough to make people puke from laughing so hard, and make those of the weak mind weep at the horror that was the humorous. Edge, proud game supporter, has always been there, been there to help the community out and be ready for a game anywhere, anytime was an excellent addition once he decided we were ok. Friend of all, and foe of none. ~LonghorN~ the manwhore joined the HSN ranks LONG before he was aware of it. His game methods and the particular sense of humor seemed to just ripple perfectly with the Network. The other members of the HSN that are located in Houston play as mostly LAN players...slowly making themselves known on Forums here and there as well as they are known in games. Ixorus was the 4th member to join the Network, supplying skills and another Euro gamer for Goblin to rape Euro noobs with. The man is rarely around these days, and is dearly missed. The HSN wishes Ixorus the best of what life can offer. Archer hopped on board to help in the countless nights of AA slaughter, then moved into Raven Shield with us. ~LonghorN~ and Black Elvis have been the most recent, and valuable additions to the clan. We love them just the gay way they are.
In HSN there are no leaders, there are no followers. We are a whole, brought on by our love for the profound, and our love for the friendship.
Speaking of catch phrases made by the HSN, like "Hail Satan" (the one which multiple clans have adopted and molded into their Hail this and thats), "Merry Christmas" was created in the same manner. To quote Goblin:
Merry Christmas! (btw, that was started by Slayve as his standard-reply on such usual stunningly eloquent Rune-comments like "LAMER!!!1", "yOU HAVE NO HONOR!!!11" and the like. We all loved it so much as the accusing whiner's tended to get even more angry after Slayve's replies....)
"**** you buddy!" was created in the same manner by being spewed forth left and right by the HSN.